Tuesday, December 14, 2010

What Else Is There To Say?

I should be writing a paper for philosophy right now, but I can't get this song out of my head. That happens to me quite frequently, and it's not necessarily an exciting event, but the songs that come into my head and stay they are usually just reflections of the way that I feel at the moment. Lately my emotions have been a little bit overwhelmed. I don't remember the last time that I slept for more than 5 hours at a time. Between finals week and the hospital it's been really frustrating trying to find time for everything.
More than that, though, I miss my family.

It's really hard to be so far away from them, especially at this time of year, and the hardest part is not really knowing how long it's gonna be til the next time that I get to come home. I wish I could play the piano by the christmas tree at night the way that I did last year. Haha me and valerie are so broke that we have a lil christmas tree sticker on our window. That's our decorations.
This has always been the song that I turn to when I'm feeling kinda alone. Angie Snider actually introduced it to me a couple years ago (I'm in your debt, again). But there's something raw about the line "I love you. And I miss you. What else is there to say?" Because there isn't anything else to say. That covers it.
The other reason that this song is particularly important right now has to do with a friend of mine. Everyone has specific times in their life that are epic and complex. Some labrynths don't appear to have an exit. The good news is that they always do, even if you have to dig your way out or call in the life-flight.
But I feel like I'm watching you break infront of me. I sincerely don't know what to do.
Needless to say, no one can walk through a hard time having nothing but a smile on their face and a cookie in their hand. Sometimes you have to listen to sad music. Sometimes you have to turn off your phone and sleep for 14 hours. What I'm trying to say is that it's okay. Have a bad day. Have sixty bad days. But remember that people are there to support you even if you don't see them. And wake up one morning, and move on.
I'm doing the only thing I can think of for you. I'm giving you the music that pulls me out of the water.

And kid?
I love you. And I miss you. What else is there to say?
Is this the sound of our demise?
Or is it just the opposite?
I love you and I miss you
What else is there to say?

It takes a hell of a lot more to complete this
Far more, far more to recreate
Far more, far more, far more, far more
Far more, far more than we can take

When you decide how much time
Do you let, do you let, do you let, do you let
Pass before
These false starts, these small meals
They're for my, for my starving hands
Just treading, just treading shallow waters
Avoiding the drop, the drop in the ocean floor

Far more, far more, far more, far more
Far more, far more than we possess
How much, how much, how much
How much longer, girl
How much longer do we need to wait?

For a moment when the blare of the TV subsides
And that song fills the air, replaying every night
A change in the key feels like a change in the season
I pretend almost every, every other night
That this body and its entirety belongs to me, every breath
It comes and goes
It comes and goes
All night

Well, you can't dictate the way, the way I'm gonna feel
No matter what, no matter what I'm forced to see
I'll be the one free of jealousy

Well, you can't dictate the way, the way I'm gonna feel
No matter what, no matter what I'm forced to see
I'll be the one free of jealousy

Far more, far more, far more, far more
Far more, far more than we can take
So well, so well, so well rehearsed
I coordinate this kind of mess

I'll do it like, do it like, do it like
Do it like, do it like, do it like
Do it like, do it like, do it like we used to
Like we used to do

I love you and I miss you
What else is there to say?

2 comments:

  1. this is probably my favorite post that you've done so far. it's so true. you're a musical and a writing genius. write music.

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  2. i do!! in the closet. I don't think i'll be prepared to come out to the world for a while. haha.

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